THE ANVIL CREW
Brian Johnstone - B'jo; Kid Seigel.- Concertina; Gail Gibbard-Whistle; Maia- minor key vocals. Fran Ashcroft/ Jon Cohrs "Special effects", grunts, etc.

Begin "Volga Boat Song" on banjo; 
1. Ou-u-r__bills were paid and our anchor weighed, as we sailed from the famed Pate's Plum. And the distant thunder roared afar, like the beat of a muffled drum. 
The lightning wi' it's vivid flash illum'ned near and far, 
And the gale began to blow ere we had passed the Gashoose Bar_O!-

(CHORUS)-The Anvil she was stout and strong broad-beamed 
and deep in keel: 
And Captain Menty walked the deck while Buck'am manned the wheel! 
2. But when we came tae Laidlaw's Cauld, there a horde o' pirates lay.
There lay the "Cat" wi' her sails a' set a-waiting for the fray.
Then boatswain Newell who was up aloft, bawled out wi' open "Moof"-
"There's a pirate on oo'r lee bow there, give her three points tae the "Soof"! O'-O'-O'___ 
(Preface verse 3 with -as "Volga Boat Song"-)
(ALL)"Row ya Buggers-row"("Ugh-H"!) "Row ya Buggers-Row"("Ugh-H"!).
"Doon-the-Tee-v-yit, Row ya Buggers, Row"! 

3. "A-ha"! -Cried Menty- "Now for revenge, the Cat's an awfu' brute:
She assailed me yince on Denholm Cauld, when I traded in fresh fruit".
"Now then my lads, stick tae yer guns and the pirate's crew we'll wallop!
For the Cat will find oot tae her cost, we're a most expensive collop"! 

4. -The battle then began and raged, for three full hours or more.
But our men were good and our guns were strong, and we drove the "Cat" ashore.
(-Change to minor and slow-funereal-)
"But when we counted up our loss, we wept you may believe;
For we found our captain dear was slain, it made us all to greive"
(ALL)"Slow-ya-Buggers-Slow"! __"Slow ya Buggers-Slow"! (Sad). 

5. (Maia - funereal). On a gun carriage we placed his corpse, and a shroud around him rolled -
We wept as we plunged him in the deep,he was worth his weight in gold.
A broken anchor we placed at his feet and our colours 'round did wrap.
(Brighten up!) ___We then smiled as we thought, had he been alive, he'd ha' sold it for old scrap! ________O-o-o---H! 
(CHORUS)
Fade out on; (ALL)"Row ya Buggers-row"----repeat---!